Sedated in a Sinking Titanic

In a pantry chat with a colleague about what we did last weekend I said, "I watched the Ballet Giselle". The sharp-witted dude replied, "I didn't think you were that kind of guy". "Well, after the Ballet, I went and watched the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show'", the midnight show. He replied, "that extreme... man you are crazy".

Anyone who has seen both will know why they both are extreme. One is a Classic, another has a cult following. One the epitome of harmony the other a cacophony of chaos. Giselle was set to a ballet in the mid 19th century, Rocky Horror Picture Show was made in the mid 70s. With Giselle, in some absolutely spectacularly choreographed scenes, you could hear a pin drop. Whereas with Rocky Horror Picture Show, among other things, people pay $2 to buy toilet paper to throw reels of it up in the air when the movie goes on, not to mention that when the movie plays on the screen there is a real-time stage act of the exact scenes in the movie by a bunch of the cult-actors (with a powerful focus-light on them), and the cult-followers of the movie have an alternate script which they keep screaming in unison as the movie goes on. The cult-followers are big on audience participation. Actually, the movie is really the side-show.

In spite of all this differences there is something both have in common they are both musical, though of a very different kind. Giselle could bring a tear to your eye as Tachiosky's 'Swan Lake' sometimes does. On the other hand, the songs in Rocky Horror Picture Show are the kind that you can't even break-dance to (not that I am expert in dancing... just saying :P).

The superficial commonality apart, there is a deeper thematic similarity between these extremes - both are about love. Rocky Horror Picture Show, in spite of all the cacophony is really about an alien transvestite, Dr. Frank, a mad scientist, who creates human beings to make them fall in love with him. The woman he had created fell in love with 'Meat Loaf' (yes... the 'I will do anything for love' Meat Loaf, he appears in the movie for a few minutes before Dr. Frank in spiteful jealousy, kills him). Dr. Frank's male creation falls in love with another woman. Dr. Frank, despondent in his search for love turns them both to stone. Dr. Frank himself gets killed by his assistants. (Of course, this is a highly abstracted synopsis of the movie, the movie has a very disjointed almost nonsensical story-line... please do not infer from this abstraction that it is a normal movie to watch. It is more of a parody than anything else).

Giselle on the other hand, is about the tenderly beautiful girl who falls in love with a Duke disguised as a peasant who couldn't care less for her except to flirt and perhaps fornicate. She thinks the disguised Duke  loves her and spurns the warnings of the guy that truly loves her. When she realizes that she has been deceived, her weak psyche gives up and she dies. The Duke feeling sorry that his frivolous flirtations had caused death visits her grave whereupon he is attacked by some Spirits that are bent upon killing him. Giselle, now the ghost intervenes, forgives the Duke and saves him from the evil Spirits.

Over all, the both stories are kind of the same... they are about two people trying to find love and both of them not finding it. But there is one key difference. In Rocky Horror, the person dies despondent and that is the end of the story. In Giselle the person dies the story does not end, in fact the better story is yet to come. Knowing why this is important is key to understanding the true nature of love.

Giselle alludes to a brilliant point that C.S.Lewis makes in the book 'Four Loves'. Love has two stages 'first-love' and then 'true-love'. For love to really be true, the first feeling based first-love has to die, and out of the ashes has to arise true love. The first love is a selfish love that seeks to get an experience of feeling-good using the person as a means. The true love that arises from the death of first-love is the real deal, it is the sacrificial love that gives oneself for the sake of the other.

In Giselle, Act I is about the death of her feel-good first-love for the disguised Duke. The whole of Act II is spectacularly done both in choreography and in the music score. It is in Act II that Giselle truly loves the Duke, magnanimously forgives him and sacrificially saves him from the evil Spirits. It is after the death of her first-love that her resurrected love becomes a truer and much stronger love.

The problem with modern love is that people do not want the first-love to die at all. Like Dr. Frank when a love dies, they tend to quickly move out and find love with another person which is again another first-love. Modernites fear death of first-love so much that they would rather keep changing the object of love instead of going through a painful love-death to resurrect with truer love. No one person can make another happy for any length of time. In fact, the reason why most divorces happen between the 5th and 8th year of marriage is because that is when the effect of death of first-love comes fully into force. In some marriages, it happens much sooner. Unless one is willing to go through the death of first-love one may never resurrect again into a stronger and truer love.

This death of first-love and resurrection of true love not a new principle at all. In fact this truth is the result of a much bigger principle of denying self which Christ talks about in the Scriptures. Christ says, 'he who looses his self will gain it'. Unless we are willing to die, we'll never really live. As Paul says in Ephesians, God created love between man and a woman to be a beautiful reflection of love between Christ and the Church. Act I of this feel-good love a warming up to the real-deal love of Act II. The love of Act II reflects the love of Christ for the Church better than the love of Act I. Between Act I and Act II there is death.

In any relationship, if we aren't willing to go through that self-denying death of feel-good love, like Dr. Frank, we'll use everything within our technological means to perpetuate love in Act I. The problem is we'll never get to Act II, in fact we'll never really get anywhere at all, which is what is happening with modern culture where for the first time in recorded human history there are more single adults (including divorced and co-habitting ones) than married adults. The problem really is that modern lovers are trying to pull a Dr. Frank in their love-life rather than imitate the love of Christ for the Church.

As crazy and extreme as it may sound, the love of Christ on the Cross for the Church is the only true model for any lasting love. In as much as modern love deviates from that model, this civilization will crumble. I am reminded of G.K.Chestertons' oft repeated quote "Civilization stands in one angle, right now we are testing angles". We are slowly moving away from a Giselle like harmony to a Rocky Horror Picture Show like chaos... and the sad thing is none is screaming, everyone appears to be sedated in the sinking Titanic.