Amazing Grace - 'saw but was blind, am blind but still I see'

I was seeing the wonderful movie the ‘Amazing Grace’ which is the story of William Wilberforce whose early life is depicted as young man confused about himself. He has a glittering political career ahead of him, his quick wittedness and rhetoric in the house stand as substantiate evidence of his abilities, but on the other his heart is most endeared to the simple and beautiful things in God’s creation, from the daffodils to the spider webs laden with the moisture of the heavy British atmosphere.

He contemplates a life of solitude for God’s service away from the politics and the pleasures of the world. He feels a need to do something about the plight of the slaves. Some tell him that he could be a politician and serve God through it. He needs guidance and goes to meet the old Rev. John Newton, the famous slave trader turned priest who penned the song ‘Amazing Grace’.

Wilberforce wants John Newton to explain to him about the atrocities faced by the slaves. All Newton tells him is that he is always haunted by twenty thousand ghosts of the slaves. He tells him nothing more.

When Wilberforce presses him further and he concedes that he has the heart to face his past by recounting his experience in the slave trade industry, an bring back the 20,000 ghosts to haunt his conscience. John Newton does not relent, he refuses go back and face the reality of his past.

Years later, Wilberforce in the thick of his struggle against the slave owners of the parliament to pass the abolition of slave trade, goes back to meet John Newton again. Then Newton is much older and ‘blind’. He notices something astounding, Newton recites an account of all his dealing in the slave trading industry and has a young man write it all down.

Wilberforce is surprised how Newton decided to do what he avowed that he would never do - bring back the old memories and allow him to be tormented by the twenty thousand ghosts.

John Newton, replies ‘I once was Blind, but now I see’. It is such a profound statement because it has no physical truth because it is only ‘now’ that he is blind. It is a metaphysical statement because earlier, though he saw, he was ‘blind’ about himself because he did not want to delve into the depths of his wretched conscience and be haunted, broken and contrite. But now he was blind but still he saw. He saw himself in true light of the conscience that God had given him.

One cannot ‘see’ oneself as long as one chooses to be blind to old hurting memories. One has to relinquish the comfort of ‘conscious amnesia’ and be haunted by ones own vileness and be broken before the One whose grace is ‘Amazing’ in the light of the vileness of ones nature and embrace His grace, before one can ‘truly’ see oneself in the light of the Light of the World.

In His Father’s Name

In my father’s Name is a movie which I started watching at about 12:00 am, I wanted to go to bed in half an hour and continue that movie the following night, but I ended up sleeping at 3:00 am as I sat and watched the whole of the movie.

It’s a story of a happy go lucky guy who of all things in the world wants to gets away from the control of his timid and conservative father and enjoy life on the high wire. He get away from Ireland to England to be as far as possible from his father. Being from Ireland he and a few of his friends and their families are tortured and framed in an IRA bombing case by the British police under the Prevention of Terrorism Act.

He gets 30 years prison sentence. His father is also convicted to 15 years sentence. He goes to his prison cell and then realizes to his utter horror that his father too has been assigned to the same cell, and his father's confession that he gald to be a guiding force in his son's prison life did not help. Of all places this was where he wanted to be away from his father, but he had to be under his watchful eye again.

Here his new life started, at the prime of his years, amid ruins. He loves his father but hates his ways of dealing with life. He had always seen his father as a timid person whose kind would become extinct in the evolutionary cycle.

But as the despondency of the prison becomes overwhelming does he realize that his timid father has a strength which he lacked, the strength of hope. His father was working on plan to expose the violation of Prevention of Terrorism Act and found hope and purpose to cling on to whereas he was finding himself sulking about life doing drugs and partnering with the strong men of prison world to incite his timid father's watchful eye.

Slowly he realized that the strong men he admired were in fact very inhuman and that their strength was a weakness of theirs to fight their feeling of insecurity. At one point he makes a ‘principled’ stand against the strong men when they try to burn the prison warden. It is only here he realizes that his father’s ubiquitous timidity was in fact great strength of principle.

It is here the father son relationship is restored. Just then his father beings to die, all his father wants is to meet his family, but that is not granted. He then asks his father how he copes separation with his wife. His father replies ‘Every night that I got to bed, I take your mom’s hand in mine and walk parks and the streets of Dublin, I have been doing it every night all these years’.

After his father’s death he remains in the prison for another 10 years, a completely changed man. Reading books, writing articles, exercising to keep himself fit. He continues this until the day evidence is uncovered the police officials had willfully framed him and his father and that he had spent 15 years in prison for no mistake of his. He is released with an apology.

He came into the prison a despondent man who thought his life, with the 40 sentence was over. When his father came and told him that he had given himself in to see to it that his son would be well, he was mad that his father would continue to keep a watchful eye over him.

But only in this state of complete loss, does the ground become fertile for a complete metamorphosis. Through his father’s, hope and principled resilience, his life gets a new meaning. He learnt the way to live from the very person, his father, whoes way of life he loathed. After his father's death, he lives on continuing where his father left, unwilling to give in to despondence, to fight the battle of life in His Father’s Name.

Greed and Fear So Accentuated...

The fifth largest brokerage and Securities firm, a firm that was 87 years old, a firm whose market value was close to $20 billion last year was sold out for a measly $240 million. Its share value which was $30 on March 14 reduced overnight to $2. Yes, I am talking about the much hounded topic the meltdown of Bear, Stearns & Co. Inc.

How do such things happen? Last year the CEO James Cayne received a salary of $40 million and this year the whole company is sold out for $240 million. What does all this mean? What does money mean? The bigger question is what does Security mean?

The cause of whole of this imbroglio is spelt out in the words of Gail Fosler, the President and chief economist of The Conference Board, independent non-profit organization doing research on management and market place economics, when she said "I have never seen the tension between greed and fear to be so accentuated…”.

On one side people were driven by greed to make the quick buck without prudent and virtuous investing principles. It was greed that was the driving force starting from the CEO of big corporations to the mortgage agencies and to the person who buys the house entirely on debt.

The financial world wanted to churn in the numbers within a year, whether practices that were undertaken to do it would make it worthwhile in the long term was never given consideration. And when their practices started working against them, fear gripped them.

All unrealized profits were going down the drain, to realize profits one had to sell out quickly even if the markets were going down so that they end up booking profits before the markets go down further more. Here the drive is fear that the market would soon go into a tail spin.

Suddenly, gripped by inexorable fear the investors had a run on Bear Stearns & Co for the tune of about $17 billion when the market value of Bear Stearns & Co was just a fraction of that amount. All investors who wanted Bear Stearns to make more money for them wanted what was left of their money, fearing that if they did not do that that even what is left out would be lost.

It was too much for Bear Stearns & Co, it had to go under. JP Morgan came to rescue, agreeing to by it for $2 a share when the previous day’s close was $30 a share down from $160 a share a year ago.

That is the story of greed and fear so accentuated… so far. Many more may follow... :(

Will this cycle of greed and fear ever end. Unfortunately, it may not, until capitilism holds sway because in the capitalistic system greed is a virtue that keeps the machine running. Fear is the natural result of unfettered greed. As we live this life in the capitalistic system we shall continue to witness many more cycles of collective greed and collective fear accentuating each other creating much havoc.

Philosophy in the Corporate World!!!!

Recently, in an interview to ET, an eminent professor from Harvard was questioned about the hurdles that were in the way to China becoming a superpower.

Interestingly, one of the hurdles he stated was that China believes in no God. Why should the corporate world be worried about the philosophic base of a country?

This is precisely because whether one likes or not the concept of God is so important to life. Much of what man does in life follows ones belief about God. When a country or a corporate setup is built on a foundation that isn’t resting on a bigger philosophic foundation of belief in God, results can be catastrophic.

Corporations are indeed worried about how a corporation built in a setup devoid of any concept of God would survive in the long term. Corporations are all about lives of people, without God, lives haven’t enough of a reason to live.

As per this Harvard Professor, the issue of atheism comes to the fore when a country is built on an atheistic foundation.

Its interesting that even the corporate world too have to give due credence to philosophy at least once in a while.

The Poignant Question in 'Alpha Dog'

A few days back, I was watching the movie Alpha Dog, a true life story, which is actually about adolescents enjoying a luxurious life on dope money. Some are in it for the fun, some are in it for the thrill and some for the dark power they get to wield on others.

The latter kind becomes the problem because when problems surface they tend to get insecure and get to use their power to eliminate the problem at any cost without regard to life.

A young innocent teenager who admires the dope dealers lifestyle becomes prey to this dark power. He is kidnapped on impulse. The police start a serious search. Then they do not know what to do with him. The guys there for fun and thrill want to make him a friend by sharing in their luxurious life style and they girls, that way this kid could be dropped off as a friend who would be grateful for all that they share.

But the guy who enjoys the dark power wants this innocent guy eliminated as he cannot trust this kid. Just when the guys take the teenager to release him, the malevolent character instructs one of the con guys to kill the teenager. The naïve teenager pleads for life but is killed cold blood.

There is a scene in the movie that is heart rending. It is an interview with the real life mother of the teenager. She is a completely distraught woman who seems increasingly imbecile with every sentence she utters because she laughs and gags at the end of every sentence to hide her overwhelming tears. But even then tears profusely flow.

In her tearful tirade against life, nature and God she asks a highly profound question. She vents her pent-up anger against God. She questions God with extreme anguish. The most important question that she puts to Him with great vehemence is the question of purpose.

She rages ‘What is the purpose of this? For what purpose did my son die?’

This brings out a very important point of how important purpose is in facing suffering in life. Man needs purpose. The undeniable need for an ultimate purpose, even in death, points to the reality of purpose.

Many nihilists maintain that every semblance of purpose is an illusion to help man live. Even this genuine need for an illusionary purpose belies the reality of purpose. But a nihilist may argue that even the need may be illusionary. He tends to forget that death isn’t illusionary, death is real. When death is real the need for a real purpose to really overcome the real loss of death also has to be real.

Even as the movie is over, her heart rending words questioning purpose reverberate through our beings.

The Financial Fundemental of the Sub-prime Mess

Sub-prime is making much noise in the media now, but the threat has been anticipated since almost the middle of 2006. I remember reading article in Economic times back in Dec 2006 about the rate hikes done by Fed (Alan Greespan then) would result in a sub-prime meltdown.

The media talks about the social side of the housing market collapse, that people were given loans recklessly and that the borrowers don’t bother to pay back and why they don’t. For the media, this makes more sensational news than the fundamental mistakes which lead to this predicament. Here I just want to talk about the fundamental mistakes made by the economic policy makers, in other words the Fed.

The problem started when Alan Greenspan was still Chairman of the fed. In a effort to keep Wall street happy, kept the interest rate as low as 1%. Wall street is always happy because people would spend more on borrowed money when interest rates are low and this would boost consumption meaning more money at Wall Street.

But everything has side effects. When interest rates go down so do yield on bonds and financial corporations were not getting enough returns on investments (ROI) so they started looking for ways to get more rate of interest. At this point the idea of easily repackaging the loan collaterals into CDO (Collateralized Debt Obligation) came in handy. This promised higher interest when compared with the banks and so the finance biggies were quick to jump in on this opportunity. It’s very interesting how CDOs work but that is out of scope here ;)

Now, this is where the problem came, such CDO (based on loan repayments) should not have been given AAA rating by risk assessment agencies, but they were. So many here was aware of risks involved and they poured money into this opportunity to get more returns. This corporate need (to get more ROI) made credit easily available and consequently the 'criteria' to lend loans was being lowered. The 'middle-man' was given a billion dollars to be lent quickly so that it could be repackaged into CDOs and sold off quickly to address the market need which is to get more ROI.

This was one route for investors get ROI (return on investment) more than the market's Fed rate of 1%. There was another route invest in emerging markets. FIIs were taking this route they invested heavily in Asian stock markets. This had a side effect, which was the depreciation of dollar against other currencies. Initially this was seen as something good, because this was lowering US fiscal deficit and making US goods cheaper abroad again keeping wall street happy.

But this artificial lowering of interest rate cannot go on for ever because, with the dollar consequently going down, that would mean the dollar loosing its place as the standard currency for all international transactions. The OPEC was looking to shift from dollar to Euro. So Fed had to raise the interest rate steadily when interest rates kept going up quarter by quarter upto 7% way back in 2006, financial analysts were already worried that the housing market would collapse and bring he economy spiraling down.

What we see now is just their prediction coming true. The problem was not that the interests were suddenly spiked, the problem was Fed wanted to please Wall Street with some quick-fixes and kept the interest rate too low. This leads to many side effects one of which is the housing fiasco.

But still financial corporations were irresponsibly continuing their affair with CDOs. It should be remembered that when Stanley O’Neal CEO of Citibank was questioned about continued investments in CDOs he replies ‘as long as the music goes on so will the dancing’, a few months later when Citibank came up with billion dollar write downs and Stanley O’Neal was asked to step down, the press was quick to remind him ‘the music most certainly will stop sometime and so will you’.

The Characters in the 'Song of Bernadette'

Song of Bernadette is a movie that profound in many ways. No wonder it got 4 Oscars in 1943. At first sight, it is about a gullible girl who is made to suffer the stigma of the society because of some visions that she sees. On a deeper side, its about what drives people in life and what difference faith makes to ones world view.

On one side is Bernadette a naive girl who hasn’t the caliber to understand the complexities of life around her. She lives a simple life enjoying all the beautiful nuances it offers. One day, she sees a vision of a ‘Beautiful Lady’ in a dump yard over a few days, but none else can see what she does. She does not try to reason out if she is in a hallucination or not, she just has faith that what she saw was indeed true. For this she is stigmatized by the following people. No matter how many times she is ridiculed by them she holds on to her faith.

Then there is the hedonist Mayor who of all cares only for his self advancement. His chief virtue is to seek affluence whatever the means, when Bernadette looked like she would affect his pursuit, he was dead against her when he realized that she meant money of a different kind, he sided with her.

Then there is the stoic nun Teacher of hers whose chief virtue in life is to suffer, to suffer for the sake of suffering hoping that suffering by itself would make her more worthy of God. She looks down on Bernadette as she is a playful simple girl. Then when Bernadette has visions of the Blessed Virgin, she is consumed with envy until she comes to the realization that Bernadette is dieing in excruciating pain at which point she asks for God forgiveness for having treated Bernadette badly and takes it upon her to care for the dieing being.

Then that is the existentialist Doctor. He pronounces Bernadette sane no matter how much the town officials want to send her to an asylum. He claims science to be above all, but his world view is that life is ‘absurdity’ because being an empiricist when he comes across miracles all he can claim is that its absurd. He is also the Sartre existentialist in that his chief virtue is to authenticate himself by his profession, in the midst of all absurdity. That is the only ethic he sees and does his work to perfection. Life to him has nothing more to offer.

Then there is the principled, pragmatic and prudent Reverend. His chief virtue is to be on the side of truth. He knows when to distance himself from Bernadette and when to side with her, whom to side with while not exactly siding with them. When he is convinced about the truth about Bernadette he fights for her tooth and nail even when it meant that he could loose his all.

Then there is the nihilist prosecutor of the city who of all people most earnestly seeks to destroy Bernadette because her claims defies his reasoning. To the prosecutor all of life has to be logical and rational. Anything that does not fit into his logical framework cannot be true. He is a loner who cares for none because logically there is no reason why anyone should care or love. When Bernadette is dead and the place where she saw the ‘Blessed Virgin’ has been converted into a Shrine where many sick come for healing he walks there knowing well that to his logical mind what was happening was an abomination. He walks there knowing that he is fighting a loosing battle with throat cancer but he cannot get himself to seek healing there because it is not logical.

He stands there and reasons out what has come of his life. His logic has driven him to nihilism. Logic and reasoning by itself cannot create anything of value in life and his life driven by logic and reasoning has become devoid of anything that is of any value. He has loved none neither has he allowed anyone to love him. His intellectual pursuits could not help him and he dies alone.

As he walk up to the altar of the shrine with all these thoughts run through his mind, he realizes that his logic cannot save him. Only a faith could give him hope and save him from despair. But his logic is so entrenched into his being that faith can have no place there. The movie ends with his plea calling Bernadette to help his unbelief, seeking help from the very thing he sought to destroy.

Story of the 'Song of Bernadette'

I had been quite sometime since my eyes got wet watching a movie until early morning today when I got to see the movie ‘Song of Bernadette’ which is a 1943 black and white movie.

When you watch the movie you’ll cry for the beauty of the peasant girl, the metaphysical kind of beauty, the beauty of a simple heart that has to endure much the stigma, doubt and the pain that when she dies she begins to doubt her own self.

It’s a story about a simple good natured peasant girl who is known for her sickliness and her gullible stupidity. All she wants in her life is to lead a simple life enjoying all the nuances of life. Even a simple splash of colors could excite her to exhilaration. Of all she just wants to marry a simple man and have a beautiful simple family. And she does have a simple kind-hearted man on her heels which bring color to her pale sickly skin.

She is the eldest last in her class, as she walks the streets everyone laughs. Her teacher snatches from her a holy picture of the manger gifted to her by the Reverend as in her opinion she hadn’t suffered enough to deserve it. Her teacher a nun herself thinks that God rewards those that suffer most.

And one day in a dump yard, she has a vision of a beautiful lady who tells her that she should come to the blessed place for 15 days and see her. Only Bernadette can see the lady, sight of the ‘beautiful lady’ brings great peace to Bernadette’s heart. Story spreads around that the ‘Blessed Virgin’ has appeared before Bernadette and suddenly the simple hearted Bernadette is the object of admiration of the masses, something she does not care for, and the object of ridicule of the elite of the city, something disturbing yet something her gullible heart cannot comprehend and the object of doubt of the Church especially her nun teacher, something that causes the deepest pains in her heart.

The Mayor, the Prosecutor, the Commissioner representing the elite as the harbingers of cultural progress, intellectual credibility, stability of the society respectively, try to do everything to stop her by portraying her as someone causing the masses to regress back to the middle ages, as someone under a hallucination and as someone who disturbs the peace of the town. They use all their powers to brand her a danger to the society, a deceiver of he masses and a fraud that has to be eliminated at all costs. They question her, confuse her and humiliate her. Her simple heart does not understand why people should be so mean to her but she still speaks the truth about her vision of the ‘beautiful lady’.

The wise Reverend silently watches to judge her genuinity having had bad experience with imposters. Her nun teacher simply distrusts Bernadette because she hasn’t suffered enough to warrant God’s grace in any form.

In the meantime the dump yard where the Blessed Virgin gives her visions becomes a place of worship of masses, but the ‘Beautiful Lady’ is visible only to the simple hearted Bernadette. The Reverend asks Bernadette to ask the Blessed Virgin to him a miracle as a sign that Bernadette indeed sees the Blessed Virgin. He tells her to ask her to make a rose plant blossom when it isn’t season yet.

The whole town rallies to the spot, the elite and the masses, to see the events that unfold. Nothing happens. Suddenly as instructed by the ‘Beautiful Lady’ whom none except Bernadette can see, she goes to eat the shrubs and starts to dig frantically at its root applying the damp soil on to her face. The crowd roars with laughter but she goes on until her mom takes her by force to her home.

Bernadette returns home not even cognizant of her stupidity for such is her simple heart. She never sees the ‘Beautiful lady’ again either.

But from the spot where she dug the soil comes out a spring which heals the sick. When the Reverend sees this, he realizes that Bernadette stands vindicated. Hordes of people being to flood the city to be healed by the holy water. The City’s elite decide to put an end to it by branding the water as unclean and by branding her mad and sending her to the asylum. The Reverend steps in to defend her.

He proposes that she be considered for Sainthood as she has been blessed by God and the water which stands a testament heals the sick. She is made to face the inquisition of the papal councils but she is never appreciated or approved. Her nun sister tells her that if she had been born a few centauries earlier she would have been burnt at the stake.

Her simple heart does not understand it all, but she knows that she loves the ‘Beautiful lady’ that appeared to her. She knows that the ‘Beautiful Lady’ was the only person who loved her and understood her. The ‘Beautiful Lady’ was her only solace. She remembers the ‘Beautiful Lady’ telling her a prophesy that Bernadette would not see happiness in this world.

Bernadette wants to marry the simple hearted man who loves her and to lead a simple life. Just then the Reverend convinces her that she having found unprecedented grace of Providence should set herself apart. It would be the cost she would have to pay. She is so simple hearted that she gives-in to his persuasion.

The childlike girl turns her back on the man that loves her, the man decides to remain celibate for the rest of his life. She embarks on her celibate life and is again put under the same nun teacher of hers from whom she faces the greatest stigma. Her nun teacher explains to her that she couldn’t have seen the Blessed Virgin as she hadn’t suffered enough in her life to be worthy before God. She tells everyone that Bernadette is a vile natured kid who came up with the story just to be the center of attention.

The nun confronts Bernadette about her lack of suffering, but Bernadette shows her a sore that causes her much pain that she had to limp around. Doctors consulted diagnose that she has tuberculosis of her bone and that she would die in excruciating pain. It is at this point her nun teacher realizes the cost the Bernadette has to pay she recants. She also realizes that she doubted Bernadette only because of her envy that the Blessed Virgin choose to appear to such a simple hearted person.

Slowly as life ebbs out of Bernadette, the stigma, ridicule and doubts that she faced begin eating into her being. Even then she still faces the question of the councils and gathers up all strength she can bolster to say emphatically that she did see the ‘Blessed Virgin’. Finally, in her deathbed, she calls for the Reverend and tells him that since the day she was humiliated eating shrubs and digging into the ground that she had never seen the ‘Beautiful Lady’ and that then she herself began for the to doubt her vision of the ‘Beautiful Lady’.

At this point one cannot help by cry for Bernadette for such a beautiful heart is made to doubt itself because of the vileness of fellow men. Just then as she regrets her life she regrets for something she does not understand and only the ‘Beautiful Lady’ can save her from this despair. As her body slowly sinks back into the bed wrenched by despair, the ‘Beautiful Lady’ the Blessed Virgin appears again, smiling and reaching out to her and Bernadette eagerly similes back with the same simple hearted smile and having been vindicated in her heart, gives up her ghost.

A Confused Rhetoric

A few days ago in my work place a seminar was organized on Work-Life balance an admirable personality was invited to speak. She is a Ph.D scholar who is involved in many social development activities.

It was a very interesting talk. I did enjoy that much and did admire her for the work she was doing and also for her confidence and presentation skills.

Her talk was edging on philosophy because it is difficult to talk about work-life balance without giving enough philosophical base as to why it is an issue of ethics and not just preferences. She had to give a framework to what she was talking about and she resorted to have the purpose of life as the framework from which to address this topic.

Of course, all this philosophic perspective was not explicit in her talk, it was the implicit assumption or the base on which her talk rested. Here, I am stating the unstated framework to put in the right perspective what I am about to say.

She said that if anyone should be caught up in anything which makes them feel unhappy she said they should quit it. The purpose of life she said was to be happy. For, example is anyone is caught up on a relationship that does not give happiness that they ought to quit it. And she substantiated it by confirming that it is a good thing that 40% of marriages in Mumbai are ending up in divorce, because now people undeterred by archaic values could decide to pull out of relationships of any form, anytime they felt not happy enough.

Pursuit of happiness became the purpose of life and Gross Happiness Product was the well being index of life. Always be happy, be happy, be happy was her recurring rhetoric. When she says so with a sweet smiling face you can’t really be critical about the content. If you don’t feel happy then change something external so that you’ll become happy was her advice.

Such rhetoric is nice to hear but if we were to step back and look at life we would find that when happiness, which is attained by manipulating the external factor, is sought as the goal of life and where happiness is made as the index of well being, there is where happiness is most elusive. And any form of aimless happiness, which is happiness for the sake of happiness, only leads to greater misery. Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World lays clear the dystopia in the utopian world where aimless happiness is sought as the highest virtue.

If we look back at our ancestor who were not that happiness crazy, we find that to them happiness was not something to be pursued but a state of mind that was the byproduct of a person being himself or herself. Somehow this truth does not resonate with anything in the mind of the modern man whose being is permeated by the noise and din of the happiness crazy world.

The other rule of life which she espoused was about loving all people. Objectively speaking, there was no reason why pursuit of happiness has to take ‘loving people’ as a normative in life. Sartre said “each is the other’s hell”. Some may say that when you love people you’ll automatically be happy, to justify that her second normative of loving people follows the first to pursue happiness as the purpose of life. But this proves that happiness only comes as a by-product when love is made the purpose. So if this argument proves anything, it is that happiness can only be really felt when it is attained as a by-product of something greater.

All she said was fine, but the problem was that her framework did not give enough basis for loving people to be made a normative. In fact to really love people one has to go through much pain, for love is never free. Free love cannot be love at all. Love has to have a cost. The cost to be paid for true love is the relinquishment of the selfish pursuit of happiness as the sole purpose of life. For where self asserts itself there love cannot be.

Her rhetoric did not cohere into a system it created conflicting normative. It was confusing rhetoric, at one point life was all about pursing ones own happiness on the other side life was all about loving people.

Looking a little deeper as to why the system did not cohere is because there wasn’t enough of a base on which to rest such normatives. God alone can give enough of a base for the framework, else they all become naïve affirmations and consequently confusing rhetoric.

Without God man hasn’t enough dignity to deserve anything in life and consequently all talk about work-life balance becomes just a series of affirmation or rhetoric which do not create a coherent system. Unless there is a system where the system creator has bestowed dignity on something all perception of inherent dignity becomes a necessary illusion. When such is the base for the frame of life all one is left with is confusing rhetoric.

Freedom isn't Free

Freedom appears to be most sought after by all men. The intelligentsia of enlightenment let out a euphoric cry of victory when it declared its freedom from the clutches of age old traditions and normative values which were based on the belief in an absolute God.

As man began to enjoy and revel in the new found freedom, he saw life from a humanistic perspective where freedom was perceived without a freedom Giver. In spite of the initial euphoria, the plight of enjoying freedom without knowing the freedom Giver slowly lead to a point at which it wasn’t known any more why freedom was given. And none was surprised when the famous existentialist philosopher from France Jean Paul Sartre said ‘I am condemned to be free’.

To Sartre in his enlightened world that was almost a couple of centauries old by then, he found not coherence all he observed was ‘absurd’. He did not know why man had to live? Why life should make any sense at all? Absurdity and nausea were the only certainties in life. But in spite of all senselessness, there was freedom.

In this context of absurdity where no unity of purpose or being in life, freedom becomes a curse because one does not know how freedom should be used. One cannot ever know if there is ever a right way of using freedom, but freedom exists. So such a freedom becomes a burden rather than a gift because the enlightened worldview has rejected the freedom Giver who is the person who knows the purpose and the limits of freedom.

His predicament is like that of one who is put in a fighter aircraft without any ‘revelation’ as to how to operate or what each of the controls are for. Such a person has absolute freedom to do all he wants, but the freedom is his curse because he knows not the purpose of such a freedom.

Freedom comes at a price and there is a price that has to be paid by the freedom Giver and a price that is to be paid by the freedom receiver. The freedom Giver pays a price in taking the risk of giving freedom to another. The freedom receiver pays a price in trying to ‘know’ how freedom should be enjoyed and by trying to align himself to the prerogatives set by the freedom Giver.

Freedom does have its limits, in the sense that freedom works within the framework where it is supposed to work for limitless freedom cannot be freedom any more because at that point freedom becomes nonsensical.

Purposeless freedom is meaningless, the price for freedom is the willingness to submit to the freedom Giver in knowing the purpose and the way to enjoy freedom.

Theology and Philosophy - Relative Importance

Philosophy is man understand of how life works. Theology is God’s revelation of how life works. To the question of what is more important than the other, quite a bit of deliberations are needed from man’s and realitiy’s point of view.

From realitiy’s point of view, theology is more important because if there is reality then there has to be an objective Person who has created reality (even if you were to call that objective entity as a force the implications are just the same) and that objective Person’s revelation of reality to man becomes theology.

From man’s point of view, theology is not something he first understands, it is philosophy that he understands. When he reads theology, he understands it a the point of meaning in philosophic frame. Using theology he frames his philosophy of life. So the end result nevertheless is philosophy.

Even the beginning comes in philosophy, because it is only based on his first understood philosophy that he decides on which theology he is to build his philosophy upon or whether to build his philosophy upon no theology at all. So philosophy is the beginning and the end. At this point it appears that philosophy encompasses theology so it appears to be more important.

But before we conclude about relative importance we need to delve a little further. If driven by ones first philosophy, if one decides to build one philosophy without any theological backing, then in the beginning though it looks like a unified theory is emerging later it is disproved and another unified theory to be proposed. So this process of cyclic disentions and new hypothesises keep on going which causes people to loose all confidence with philosophy. And at that point philosophy cannot trust itself any more (as in the case of Rousseau and the French Revolution or Kierkegaard and his existentialism) leads to annihilation of reason. The basic point of philosophy becomes that there is no philosophy objective enough to be trusted. Or in other words philosophy degenerates into anti-philosophy.

For theology to be comprehended there has to be philosophy for philosophy to be real and for it to have enough of a base to stand on there has to be theology. In the end, theology can exist independently, but philosophy devoid of a theological base cannot exist without disintegrating into anti-philosophy. So theology comes out stronger than philosophy.

My Meditations on Valentine's Day ;)

As I was writing my journal today early morning about 2:30 am, I realized that it was already Valentine's day and it got me a wee bit too romantic in my journal. Nevertheless, being a proud single guy I just wanted to share with all a few sober thoughts.

With the media creating some much hype sensualizing Valentine's day and the society getting increasingly prejudiced by the media, to the post modern 'progressive' man to be single on Valentine's day has become an abomination. To him/her being still single is to be outside the 'Survival of the Fittest' and destined to for extinction in a 'progressive' world.

In the animal kingdom to be unpaired is to be undesirable or unworthy of genetic propagation, the kind that is inferior that he/she is unworthy of life itself. And man living in the post modern world with a 'progressive' naturalistic worldview has no reason why this truth of the animal kingdom should not be applied to human race as well, after all man is a social animal say the science text books.

It’s a pity that the 'progressive' man is actually progressing (as per his worldview it is not regressing but still progressing) back to ape-hood, with regard to the quintessential essence of his innate 'nature'.

To such an apeman, there is no pride in 'character' there is no pride in singleness. To be proud about character or singleness as against following the throng and always be in a relationship, is relegated as archaic morality which is soon to be extinct.

So in the young man's or woman's life to pair up is a face saving act, whether it is with the right person or not is immaterial. The only concern is about whether or not they are in a relationship. And to be unpaired on the Valentine's day is consequently an abomination.

If Christ were to come into this setup, I think He would have said...

'Blessed are those who are single,
For they shall find true love'

Love unlike instinct is not driven by feelings but by a commitment. Commitment comes with patience and prudence in dealing with relationship. Unless there is respect for singleness, there would never be enough maturity for commitment. By jumping headlong into relationships one takes the route to never ever finding true love in life.

It’s better to be single than to be with the wrong person. To be single may not be heaven, but to be with the wrong person is most certainly hell. Its better to be and embodiment of strength in singleness than to spinelessly enter into a wrong relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship and thereby be accepted by the 'progressive' throng.

So the Valentine ’s Day, I would like to encourage all Christian singles to cherish their strength of character in singleness and build on it without feeling inferior or inadequate. They should rather be proud about flaunting their strength in singleness and the opportunity that singleness gives to mature and eventually find the one true love for which they are being fashioned. I would also urge them to prayerfully submit themselves and their yet-to-be-known future spouses to God.

All young Christians who are already paired-up need to re-evaluate their love for God. Before they go to beaches or restaurants or movies with each other to enjoy Valentine’s Day, they should first go to a nearby Church as a symbolic act, submit to God inviting him to be the love of their lives and the unseen host through all of their Valentine’s Day celebrations and their ensuing committed life together.

To all the paired-up ones… ‘Enjoy the Valentine’s Day with your mate submitting to the One True Valentine’

To all the singles… ‘Enjoy the Independence day as your freedom may soon be consumed in love’ :)

May His Blessings Abound,
Emmu.

The Mystic Beauty of Traditional Worship

As we live in a world where increasing number of people, especially the younger ones, think that the traditional way of worshiping the Lord with hymns, pipe organs, mandolins and harps is inferior to the lively free form of contemporary worship that the more contemporary songs with keyboards, bass guitars and electronic drum pads bring, we need to take a second look at traditions and ascertain if we are missing an important facet of worship by relegating the timeless traditional form of worship as too archaic for the post modern man.

This Christmas, I attended St. John’s Divine Church because I wanted to experience the mystic awe in the traditional form of worship.

Unifying the spirits
The service started with a concert and then choir came in a procession with the incense being spewed out in front filling the Church with the kind of misty aura symbolic of the presence of God that filled the Church of Solomon in the form of a cloud (1 Kings 8:10-13). This unified the spirits of the congregation into humility and a reverent awe of God. It was a symbolic act that set the mood right for a heavenly worship that was to follow.

A celebration of traditions as a mystic act of worship
When the singing started, the presence of God could be felt. I think the reason was the people (at least most of them!) who were singing in the Choir and the congregation had just one motive in their minds which was to glorify God with the best of their abilities using the ancient traditions in which is imbibed the glory of the mystical worship of God. These great works of arts, Bach’s Fuges and the Pipe Organ, were created for the sole purpose of using the grandiose creative geniuses of human kind to glorify God. To place such creations of beauty at the feet of God is a mystic act of worship. Without God there is no beauty, without beauty there is no God. The experience of worship overwhelmed the senses with the beauty of God’s creation glorifying Him in a mystic celebration of ancient arts.

I did notice a few people raise their hands in worship. And I wondered why people assume that raising hands in an act of worship is forbidden in traditional worship services.

God the only Celebrity
What I love about traditional worship is that it is community centered worship. The choir, the congregation all worship God as one whole mass of individuals, there was no worship leader there was no lead singer there is no lead guitarist, there is no beautiful face to look up on the giant screens there is no Celebrity singer dressed in the designer wear that captures too much attention, it is just a big choir raising up their voices in unison to glorify God, the only Celebrity in the whole enterprise.

Depth of Truth in Worship
The words of the ancient Hymns have a depth of meaning because they were wrought in the throes of the pain and the struggles that the great Saints of the great old ages endured. Unlike most contemporary song-writers, their song writing was not an art or a skill or something that gave them fortune and fame, but their songs were an expression of God’s love and grace in the midst of the anguish of their hearts. The anguish they felt when they went through pain whether it be of suffering, love or pleasure, for the highest form of pleasure where beauty and love is the essence evokes a sense of pain in the mortal human heart.

Such eternal timeless truths exemplified through their writing reigns supreme in a traditional worship because of the harmony and resolution of music mystically resonates with the depth of Truth expressed. A person's heart and mind are tuned to revel in the beauty of such Truths and the music serves only to incline ones heart and mind to assimilate the Truth.

The Right Chord
Such traditions have struck the right chord between worship in Spirit and Truth. God says that we ought to worship Him in spirit and Truth. In such ancient traditions we experience the mystic beauty of God's Spirit and as we also revel in the great Truths which cause our throats to croak and sigh under the enormity of the weight of what is being sung.

As we were singing

'What Child is this...

...Why lies He in such mean estate,
Where ox and ass are feeding?
Good Christians, fear, for sinners here
The silent Word is pleading.'

There wasn't a tongue in the whole Church that did not sing in trepidation and awe the grandiose Truth so beautifully broughtout through the best of man’s creative genius, put at the feet of the King for His glory alone.

The Kabaali game - played by men who are still boys ;)

Below are some snaps from our project tour taken at the botanical garden at Ooty. The snaps here are about a game called 'kabaali' that we play in each of our tours. Guys here hardly seem to have any semblence to the image of the hard-thinking IT professionals on has in ones mind. Just think of these guys as men in physique but still boys at heart. :)

This is called 'Kabaali'

This is how it starts... A guy 'that lamb for the slug feast' lies down and then a guy jumps on top of him....

And then another jumps on and a tower is build.... as ppl join in... until the guy at the bottom soffocates to death ;)

And then there is some bumping to increase the pressure on those at the bottom...

...until the tower begins to collapse under its own weight.... :)

The guy at the bottom prays that the tower collapses soon ;) and when it does lets out a sigh of relief, quite literally, because until the tower stands he wouldn't be able to breathe

We being rolling down the slope under the force of the collapse...

...the rolling continues...

... for quite some distance, not to mention the slope which didn't help in stopping sooner...

This time the tower is on Senthil...

... there is collapses... much to Senthil's relief... :)

..now its Selva's turn at the bottom... he shows attitide ;)

... finally, its my turn to be at the bottom... Santhanam bemoans that no matter how high the tower would not that nothing would harm the 'jandu' (animal) ;)... guys come running eager to prove Santhanam wrong...

smiling as always... tower or no tower...

Having a few moments of solitude on the soft grassy slopes, with the book, under the shade of an old tree with the gentle breeze carrying along with it the fragrance of unadultrated nature, I could go on and on an on... I had wanted to complete the book before the tour was over. 'When God Writes Your Love Story' was was a pretty good book to read in the slopes of the Ooty botanical garden with a host of couples celeberating their love stories along side. ;)

This is my project team... none of the girls opted to come this time. Perhaps they were scared of kabaalification :) (not that they were kaballified last time but they did witness the gruesome game, last time kabaalification happened in the train from Chennai to Mysore... :)

Some of you might wonder what kind of joy one can have in a game that looks too childish and even primitive in the world of computers and virtual reality. But Kabaali is a game that has a machoistic childish kind of pleasure, its not sadistic. It can be enjoyed only by those who play it, spectators can't really enjoy this. Its a game played by guys who are supposed to be men but are still boy at heart.

Black and White Beauty :)

Black and White photos have about them a kind of mystery which leave much room for imagination, contemplation and even a kind of mythical admiration which is not possible in most of the colourful photographs which so titilate our 'material' senses.

Below are a few B/W photos I found myself snapping around during my recent tour in Ooty. With B/W photos one gets to admire a kind of meta-physical beauty in all the creation of God, unperturbed by the colourful distractions which consume our senses.

The morning Sun light splashes on the landscape a kind of misty aura.

The shrubs closer to us seem bigger than the tall trees far off in the other hill. So it is with our problems, our miniscule problems seem monstrous in comparion to the humungous ones others have. ;)

Lean tall ones interspersed with the shorter bushy ones, yet there is still a esthetic harmony. :)

Dilapated homes - Secluded habitats don't really thrive just like seculeded civilizations tend to die with time.

Looks like the great old one is having a second lease of life... Like Nicodemus???

Journeying through a long life following upon another's wake...

Is there no end to these immense landscapes that fill the horizons to the brim???

The water, the trees, the clouds and the sky all merge into a molotic reality made for the sole purpose of being 'there' to be gazed at. :)

Gazing into all the physical (and metaphysical) beauty all around...

I am not expert photographer, but I shall continue on this journey enjoying through Black and White the Beauty of God's and man's creativity which again if anything, exemplifies the creative Beauty of God.

An account of my cherised experience with Lakewood folks :)

Below is an account of my stay in Houston with you good people. How beautiful it is to be with those who love the Lord.

The Initial Alienation:

Though it was my second time here for the first week, differently looking people, differently built apartments were making me feel alien, and I went to read a book by the pool and I lay down and looked up at the sky I found the clouds 'sailing across the big blue sky' and I felt more at home, felt that though I was half the world across, it was still under the same big blue beautiful sky created by the beautiful One. I had enjoyed seeing the clouds sailing across the clear blue sky in India and it was a déjà vu. I thanked God that even though I was on the other side of the globe from my home, I was still under His dominion and all that I saw as alien were still His beautiful creation. ;)

The Bear Hug:

The first person I talked to over phone was Momo. The first person I met and dined with here was Alisha. The first person to give me that warm loving Lake Wood 'bear hug' was Eleanor.

I had kept my arrival to Houston the second time a secret from most folks. I wanted to surprise them. Most of all I wanted to surprise Steve G because he was my good pal during my first visit. I remember the expression on his face when he first saw me, it was the shock of having seen a ghost. I bet he was thinking 'Is this Emmanuel or his ghost that I see?' initially in shock he jerked back a moment and when he had come to senses in split second he jumped towards me and gave me the same Lake Wood hug. And I knew I was getting to feel at home. :)

And then I met Crystal and her husband. When I was here last time she was still single. We used to have a good time hanging at her pool parties. This time too we had good time at the parties in her loft we did have the pool as well.

At Home at Last:

A view from the gallaries of the LakeWood Church which is the largest Church in America, its a Basketball stadium turned into a Chruch

That Sunday Eleanor picked me up for Church a routine she continued almost every week throughout my stay here. And when I was at Church after having been in Houston for about 10 days but still not feeling completely at home that I distinctly felt a peace just as the music was starting. The feeling of being alien lifted off. It was then I knew I was at home at last, I was again at the feet of the same Lord I used to worship on the other side of the globe, only now I was home with all the Lakewood folks around me who Loved Him and loved me because of His love.

About Parties and Dogs:

This snap was taken on X'mas day at Andrew's house. You can see Andrew in pic attending a call

The costume party at Tracy's house was the first costume party of my life and I couldn't enjoy it more. Tracy's little dog was a timid lovely being with beautiful eyes. Speaking of dogs, Andrew's dogs Nutty and I forgot the name of the other are the more hyper active dogs I came across, they were still running around till after 5 minutes since we Rolandan, Debra and I had arrived at his house. Nutty is one of the very few dogs that can look into a one eye and hold the gaze, it of course is one of the most intelligent dogs I have come across. Unfortunately this time I couldn't meet Eleanor's extrovert dog Sheba.

Lunches & Dinners - American politics to Practice Dudes:

This pic was taken on New Year's morning at about 3:00 am at a restraunt we all went to after the New Year's Fellowship Party with the folks from Lakewood Church :)

I enjoy talking in restraints. Initially I was not able spend much time with the Lakewood folks because my work in company was all consuming. But later I was able to attend Wednesday services and other weekend get-togethers. More than once our Wednesday after service dinner were dominated by up coming American elections. I was amused listening to how each American had so many different opinions on who their guy/girl for the post would be even though there are just two parties to choose from, unlike India where national elections are contested by a plethora of parties.

On a Wednesday night after dinner at Chillis, Eleanor, John K, Chris and I stood outside and talked about what American politics really was and what American freedom really meant to the average American. We were talking till 2:00 am. I loved the insights shared from why America had to go to war to why Hillary just might make it in the upcoming elections.

Unsaid, I enjoyed going to the movie 'The Golden Compass' with Steve (golden) he is a cool guy who took a lot of ribbing from Beth and Apple when we along with Ike were having lunch after Church. After the movie I met the 'character' Timmy. My God, I dont think I have met someone like him before. He and I quickly got into a conversation of riddles in which we pulled the legs of people around us without them having a clue what we were talking about. At I-hop, Timmy and I were talking about how one could identify ones future spouse. Apple offered to help by suggesting a ‘three clicks' method, taught to her by her youth pastor, to identify future spouses and got run over by Timmy.

The dinner that I cannot forget and something which may be made immortal by the book that I am to write is the one at 59 Dinners which took place after the New Year's party at Lakewood. It was the dinner conversation which was centered the practice of having someone to practice upon for marriage, as to how to behave with ones spouse so as to avoid the possibility of a divorce after marriage. Its a premarital practice of marriage with the practice dude. This practice was proposed and Christened by Tracy as 'Practice Dude'. Eleanor, John K, Stephanie and a few others were trying to prove to Tracy as to why the practice of 'Practice Dude' was impractical, of course it was the most hilarious conversation we ever had.

A Spiritual Reformation:

During my stay there, I was going through a spiritual reformation. I was getting into a deeper relationship with Him in learning to surrender my all to Him. The books that I was reading the messages I listened to in Wednesday services and conversations I had with Lakewood folks and my own quiet time with God were creating in me a cleaner heart to serve him.

I happened to come to Houston at an important time in my career when I was to make some important decision, but because I was in Houston I could not make those decisions and I was asking God as to why He had brought me to Houston at such a crucial time. Slowly, He let me know that it was a time He was using to prepare me to be more dependent on Him alone. He was preparing me for something big, but before that I had to know that by myself I was small.

Just before I was leaving Houston, I was convicted in spirit by God that none of the decisions that I make in my life should be driven by the money factor. i.e, Whatever I do whether it be company shift or career shift or starting a company or a marrying someone it should all be because God wants me to do that and not because I can make more money by doing that. There is nothing wrong in trying to make more money but the human heart is so vile that if money making is made an important factor, it often goes away from God's ‘first-best’ in ones life. The evil impetus is about yielding to the desire to make more money than what God has given now.

An Important Meeting:

One Sunday there was a guy in front of Lakewood holding a placard saying 'False Gospel Here'. I went and spoke with that guy as I was impelled to do so, Alisha said she too would like to come with me and the two of us went.

As we were talking I found that some of his Christian doctrine was skewed, but some of his objections about Lakewood were actually valid. He said that Lakewood gospel was based on prosperity doctrine, I don’t agree with him entirely but I agree that there is a bent towards prosperity in the messages of preachers who are invited to talk in Lakewood.

Riches is not a blessing, often mishandled riches has been a curse. Paul says money is the root of all evil. Christ was born poor, blessed are the poor said Christ. Rich can't go to heaven said Christ as easily as a camel could go through the eye of a needle. Self-denial is the way to Christ. Christ-likeness is the goal of Christianity. Not to have much money is more blessed than to have excess money. But this he felt was seldom preached in Lakewood.

A ministry of hope in a hopeless world is important but too much hope without being convicted in spirit is the first level of Christianity. Christian life is about progressing into deeper level of Christianity by self-denial and self-giving sacrifice. People need hope, but the deeper needs of people is not just to be pampered by hope through motivating ‘think positive’ speeches, but to live a life of self-denial and Christ-likeness for Christ unequivocally says 'unless you deny your self, carry your cross and follow me you cannot be my disciple (neither will He ‘know’ us when the sheep and goat are separated)’.

No Church is perfect, every church has some deficiency Lakewood is not exempt. We as good Lakewooders need to pray that Lakewood would progress from the first level of pampered Christianity to a deeper level of self denying, flesh defying Christianity.

All About Love:

This was a party at Valerie's house... one of those moments when the love becomes so overwhelming that it just can't be contained...

The one reality which made me feel at home with the Lakewood folks is the Christian love with which I was embraced every time I was with all of you.

In spite of all evil and apathy we observe around us, the one true reality that makes life livable is the love which we show each other. Lakewood for one thing never lacks in the Love that adorns itself with an aura which embraces and draws to itself even the sickest of hearts.

We live in a world where knowledge is power. The more knowledge one has the more power one wields. People go to school, attend crash courses to acquire knowledge and skills to survive this life.

But there is only one knowledge that is absolute and will always save you it is the knowledge that the One who spoke the universe into being hung up on the tree as an unresisting lamb.

1Co 2:2 For I resolved to ‘know’ nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.

1Co 2:3 I came to you in weakness and fear, and with much trembling.

Even if you loose your all in your life, even if there is nothing to look forward to in life, if there is a knowledge of some thing that would save you it is the knowledge that Christ was crucified for you, there is nothing more you need if only you 'really' knew this.

It is the love that He showed on the cross that is imbibed into each of us which adorns us with the beauty of the Spirit and makes us an embodiment of 'true' blessing to thousands around us.

Farewell:

I was taken by surprise when Eleanor said that I had to give my farewell speech at the Tiki Island New Year eve party. I did not expect is so soon. It seemed that I had just landed in Houston and was still getting to knowing people but alas it was time for me to go.

World is a small place, we live in a global village someday we shall all meet again. Even if we don’t we shall meet again on the other shore and spend an eternity together. We shall hug each other with the same Lakewood hugs. We shall have lunches, dinners, costume parties and we shall still be talking about 'practice dudes'. Until then… Farewell!!!

This was the farewell pic that they all took with me as it was my last Sunday with them. They are indeed most loving folks that can be seen that the beautiful land of America :)

A 'Blessed' Christmas...

For once did Divinity take upon Himself to be human
At the home of the poorest and oppressed in earth
For if Divinity hadn't the 'heart' to experience poverty and oppression
Divinity couldn't be Divinity at all.

Divinity would have lost the chance
A chance for humans understand the embodiment of Love He is.

Reckon, that Christmas is a call to parttake of Divinity
Blessed are the Poor and the marginilized
Its a Call to embrace the league of the 'truly' Blessed
And be 'truly' Blessed.

Happy Holidays???

I am facing the predicament of spending this Christmas in the US away from family. Here in the US, I stiwtch on the TV it blares 'Happy Holidays', the ad hoardings and bill boards follow suite and the magazines aint any different either.

Having to face the predicament of sitting all alone (away from family) on Christmas day with only books for my only company is not as depressing as getting greeting cards being wished 'Happy Holidays' instead of 'Happy Christmas' by Christian colleagues here in US.

Wait a moment. This is supposed to be Christmas right. I was told Christmas season was BIG in America. But alas it aint any more. Its just 'Happy Holidays'.

In the US to wish 'Happy Christmas' has beomce 'politically incorrect'. It is considered a vestige from the dark ages which only the archaic haven't still be able to do away with.

What is depressing about that is not just that only when people wish me 'Happy Holidays' with greeting cards and sweets that I realize that it is only I who hasn't any holidays during this season, or that the whole aura and joy of transcendence is missing as it has already been missing for many decades now, but that I realize now that the last links that Christmas has had as being the day of grateful rememberance of Divinity invading of human shpere has been severed.

The next generation to be born here wouldn't even have a chance to go to Chruch at least on the Christmas day. When it is all just happy holidays, why bother going to Church. They wouldn't have much of a chance even to reflect at least once in a year, that a supposed Christ, a supposed God had been born in human flesh.

I dont even agree with wishing 'Merry Christmas' as though Christmas is all about epicurian merry making, I would prefer 'Joyful Christmas' or better still 'Blessed Christmas'. But now i wish at least it stayed as 'Merry Christmas'.

The hard Truth seems to be that much of what is done in the name of Christmas in the US is at best depressing and at worst next step towards decadance.

Beautiful Bella :)

A couple of weeks ago most of us, Lake Wood folks, watched the movie Bella. It was a movie I loved to the bits. There were times when my eyes were almost getting wet.

Simply put, Bella is about ‘beauty’ and ‘people’.

In the beginning of the movie, the seemingly incongruous scene of a blind man selling some simple artwork making a ‘deal’ with Nina, actually, sets theme of the whole movie that life is not about money, about 'beauty' and 'people'.

He asks her if she would buy a piece of art from him, but she says she has no money. He makes a deal with her, he asks her to describe the beauty she sees around her and she having just been fired from her job and also realizing that she was pregnant, goes on to describe the what she sees. Her plain description of the quotidian things of life, translated into a vision of  'beauty' in the mind of  the blind man. All the blind man wanted was to experience ‘beauty’ and ‘people’ to talk to.

Even Manny, the dark handsome brother, the guy who fired Nina, when all is said and done, at the end of the day needs the loving embrace of his brother, Jose, in spite of having fired Jose himself earlier in the day. His hot-headedness not withstanding, he takes the first step to reconciliation by buying a new frying pan for his brother. As the Bible says, reconcile anger before sun goes down, and it shall go fine.

Our hero, Jose, the hot and handsome soccer star turned child slayer turned convict turned chief chef turned the Bella about-to-be-aborted child's Savior is a ‘beauty’ (metaphysical). Even though he unwittingly ran over a child killing her, he feels mortally guilty of inexorably depriving a mother of everything she had in her life.

Even when he flushes out the lettuce in his Chef's kitchen, his guilt causes him to see in it the pattern of the beautiful butterfly the child played with before she was run over by his car. That haunts him and keeps alive in him the need for redemption. He needed to be someone's Savior and here comes Nina wanting to abort her kid.

Nina on the other hand is a person who never had a chance to live. Loosing her father at 12 and having to support her mentally deranged mother all through her teens alienated her from experiencing beauty in her life. And her loosing her job and discovering that very morning that she was also pregnant as well did not help it any further. From past experience, her premonition is that if she would have her kid that would alienate her from any possibility of experience the something good in life. What she needs is a savior, someone who’ll take her burden and allow her chance to be independent at least for once in her life.

Jose’s dad is a simple character who is all about ‘beauty’ of life. Whether it is planting trees or making beautiful lanterns to be taken to the beach or dancing around with his wife or playing football. To him life is all about making it all beautiful for everyone to enjoy life.

Jose’s mom is wise woman who is all about ‘people’. Though she does not approve Jose of having let down his brother Manny for the sake of Nina, she speaks kindly to her and makes her welcome. Being sensitive to Nina’s apprehensions about Manny she even lets her in about the truth that Manny was their foster child. The scene in which Jose hugs his mom and cries for what has become of his life, is touching. Jose knew that he was close to getting his redemption and had to let out the tears he had held within him all these years. 'Cry my boy, cry it all out' says she and holds his head in with her comforting arms.

As the movie progresses, one keeps wondering who Bella is. Jose agrees to be Nina's Savior, he urges her ot have the child and 'commits' to grow her child. And the name of this child is Bella. And thus the movie is called 'Bella'.

The heart of the movie is Jose who when he was about the reach the pinnacle of glory and riches came to experience a heart wrenching reversal of fortunes. He did not blame fate but persevered to make the best of his life though it meant that he had to work as a chef to support his brother. Eventually he got to be the savior who would make life ‘beautiful’ to the beautiful Bella.

All pain and drudgery Jose had to undergo makes ‘beautiful’ sense because of the beautiful Bella. Someone told me that it was a romantic movie. But this beauty is something far beyond romance, it is 'redeeming' love, which is a reflection of God's love for people. After all, every man with a spine, even in his fallen state, can't help but be a reflection of the redeeming love of God.

Its all about beauty and people.

It’s a movie worth watching. I am hunting for its DVD. :)

Golden Compass - What's at stake?

This week after Chruch we guys went to movies some to 'This Christmas' some to 'August Rush' and only Steve and I found our selves at 'Golden Compass' which is the rebuttal to 'Narnia' in the Narnia uses fantasy to bring out Christian Truth where as this uses fantasy to 'undermine Christian Truth' (to quote the Trilogy's author Philip Pullman).

Book Vs Movie:

The first truth we as Christians need to understand about this is that the intent of Philip Pullman was to undermine Christianity, but the intent of the movie is to make money by not offending Christian sentiments and they have gone great length to keep anything suggesting that the movie has anything against the Church.

The book is about breaking from the holds of the Church and God from our lives, but the movie is about breaking from the body of authority that is above us telling us what to do and intervening with our free will.

The Philosophic base:

This is a complex movie/book. There are many levels of perception. I haven't read the book and there aren't any reviews about the philosophy of the movie so what I write is entirely my perception on seeing the movie.
It is about gaining freewill and that is what the struggle is for. Narnia or Lord of the Rings is also about gaining freewill. But the difference is this, that in Narnia freewill is conferred by God and the devil uses sin to prevent us from realizing it to the fullest. On the contrary, in 'Golden Compass', God restricts man's freewill using religious laws and authority and to break free from God’s authority and be sinful is to enjoy freewill, so sin becomes virtue. Sin is looked upon as something good.

In Narnia or Lord of the Rings strength, honor, love, trust are virtues. But in Golden Compass knowledge is virtue, 'knowledge about sin' does that ring a bell? Yes this is a kind of re-enactment of the fall of man in the Garden except that here the fall is looked upon as the fist step to freedom from God. The fall helped man to break away from God and gain complete freedom, but before man could fully enjoy it, the church intervened and freewill was lost. This book is about destroying the hold of the Church and gaining freedom again.

I think (my perception could be wrong), as per the setup of the fantasy world in the movie, the 'dust' which the academicians say (is the ultimate reality of the universe) permeates all universe is actually a metaphor for sin and the movie says that dust feeds into man through his deamon (soul - an animal). The church tries to deny and stop the feeding of dust through the deamon by kidnapping kids and making them immune to dust, and the freedom fighters go on war against the church because they believe that only through the feeding of dust into them through the deamon they would enjoy un-curtailed freewill.

To me, this is closer to Gnosticism (which Da Vinci Code touches upon) where sin is virtue, God is evil and the devil is the liberator who liberated man through the woman by making her wise though the fruit. Knowledge of sin is wisdom. This is how I think this atheist tries to build his case. And in Gnosticism God is feminine as Eve is supposed to be the source of wisdom, that is why it is a girl who is supposed to be the redeemer of mankind. She is the second-eve. And her plan for redemption is to eat more of the fruit and gain complete knowledge and freedom.

Problem with this Philosophy:

From the Christian world view, the problem with this (Godless) perception of freedom and freewill is that without God's leading in our lives, our (Godless) freedom becomes akin to the freedom of a boat without a rudder in the open sea. It looks like such a boat is 'free' to go all places, but in truth that freedom is entirely under the mercy of nature, so such a freedom without God is actually slavery to nature.

Man has the God given freedom to choose freedom 'under' God or freedom 'under' nature. The difference is if one chooses freedom 'under' God, one becomes God's most loved child. But instead, if one chooses to enjoy the freedom 'under' nature, one inexorably, in the long run becomes a slave to nature.

To the atheists, the concept of God is so revolting that they choose slavery to nature and embellish it as greatest freedom a two legged being can enjoy on planet earth.

Can Christians watch the movie?

The movie does not say anything overtly anti-Christian. You will not see a Church or a cross. You'll see men in black robes wearing big pendants which can never be misconstrued to resemble a cross. Their building looks more like the White House than a Church. This movie is a war against authority. It more about anarchy than about anti-Christianity. Without knowing how the second and third part comes out, we cannot truly comment how it would look at the end, but I have a feeling that the directors wouldn't want to make it anti-Christian.

Well, this is not a 'must see' movie as the Lord of the Rings is. Its not as good with fantasy. The plot is intriguing, the movie is fast paced and its dark, I mean even the heroes are dark characters who care not for love or honour or bliss of innocence. When God is taken out of the equation, darkness results, it can't be helped.

I think Christians can see this movie, but must be on the guard. If the Lord's 'leading' is to not see then obey the 'leading'. One can't go wrong excercising caution :)